Con su permisio (with your permission), I’d like to continue with snips from the M.W.A.K. Columbian, the newsletter of the Mason Walsh Atkinson Kier Company, builders of Grand Coulee Dam, for their employees housed in the company town of Mason City.

One issue featured a list of Ways To Keep From Growing Old: 

(Remember, this is advice for the workers on the dam.)

1. Don’t wear your safety belt.
2. Do walk under overhead swinging loads.
3. Do put your hand on a roller under the conveyor belt.
4. Do talk back to one of our local minions of the law.
5. Do step in from of a “cat.”
6. Do handle electrical fixtures with wet hands.
7. Do ignore the blasting signal whistles.
8. Do eat with your knife.
9. Do neglect to get prompt first aid when you’ve had an accident.
10. Do not pay close attention to what you are going and what is going on around you.

This bit of sage advice was followed by  jokes:  Teacher: “Spell straight.” Johnny:  “S-T-R-A-I-G-H-T.”  Teacher: “Good! Now what does it mean?” Johnny, “Without Ginger Ale!”

Little Mary comes home from Sunday School and was asked by her mother what she had learned. Mary replied, “Oh, we learned all about King Solomon and his cucumber vines.”